So i am a music junkie. i love music. music is almost my life. haha. erm.. I admit i am not diverse in the music i listen to. but i dare say that i am a music junkie more than the average fella on the street. except those with iPods? hehe... dunno maybe. maybe not. maybe we're the same. but here's no competion. here's to writing (or blogging) what music means to me in my life.
I consume music for feel good reasons. what i look for in songs are how loopable it is. songs that are more loopable the better it is.. to me at least. I remember when Blink's Rock Show came out, i looped it the whole night, even while i was not in the room. Currently i think Asian Kung Fu Generation's Rashinban (Compass) is on number one loop with 175. But of course, dats little.
Another thing i look for in great tunes (and bands) are how uplifting a song is. I love songs when you are feeling damn down, you put in the song and immiediately it hits u or at least it has a healing or purging effect on u. So this then includes angry songs.. heh. or loud songs. but no necessarily have to be loud or angry. That's why i love a good rock song, that's upbeat, melodic (at times), has never ending driving basslines, ascending riffs, loaded power chords, etc. Love those songs. But dis is also why sometimes, i am only attracted to slower songs if they mean alot to me, or if like, i am in that kind of mood and it reflects how i feel so that in the reflection i may find my peace or pacify whatever that's inside me.
I love songs that are like a breath of fresh air. First play and it hits you and knocks the breath out of you.... they are like "OUH MAN. WOW". those types are the most awesome that makes you wonder "where the hell have i been before this song?!" love those love those. knocks the breath out of u, lifts you up, soar with them and die with them... rare, but these songs are usually the begining of a long and beautiful.... obsession, wuahahaha. I love Ash, Oasis, Asian Kung Fu Generation and some random songs here and there for this very reason.
I love songs that have a fucking good hook. Whatever it is. The hook can just come in the form of a riff, or a solo (like Ash's Petrol), or it can come from the lyrics that mean alot to me, can come in the form of driving basslines, or a continuous punch of chords and words (like AKG's Sono Wake O beautiful, beautiful), can come in the simple form of an added instrument here and there like a xylaphone or a second guitar (i like Wonderwall's bridge for that, Ash's Stormy Waters), or the use of multiple guitars that just seem to make love to each other and blend in oh so beautifully! or the use of double vocals, or a very sudden melodic line (like Blink's "She left me roses by the stairs" <-- That one line, ouh man, was the VERY BEGINING of this whole long ride with punkrock and emo that ultimately became this American dream thing), dancy tunes, upbeat music, incredible bass, etc.
So what songs mean to me. Songs are cure to a fucking broken heart. when a fucking guy breaks my heart (like fucking last night) shove in Finch and hear Nate's scream and i felt a little alright. Or like today, shoved Hellogoodbye Shimmy Shimmy Quarter turn and i found a little strength to say "FUCK YOU, FUCK OFF, FUCKER" to akio a little better... Oddly enough, Hellogoodbye is the happy song and Finch is the angry one ne.
Songs are there to dance, to pacify an angry soul. to find peace within one's self. a way to calm the angry voice. a way to give voice to the anger. a way to give voice to the feelings we feel and maybe hide and bury inside. songs are ways to die and to live and to die and drown and be lifted up above yourself and all the shit and feel happy even thought it's just a fucking melody that had inspired that smile on your face and the fucking calmness inside your heart. Songs are to make you dance, to make you cry, to inspire, to hide, to tell, to speak, to calm, to make, to dream, to help you along the way when there's only you and you and you and you and you and you alone with and against yourself and the world. that is the beauty of a melody that captures.
I want to look for a guy that is like a Hellogoodbye song. Someone who is and makes it fun, happy, dancy to be with him but not necessary someone who means alot to me.
Taking Back Sunday guys/friend are people who are fun to be with yet means alot to me. All my TBS friends include Michelle, Luis, another Michelle and Melissa... and all my concert friends over here.
Finch people are those who mean alot to me and there's heaviness to being with them, a love yet a pain and hurt but an attraction and a longing to be with them. And yet when you are with them, the world fades and all you remember and feel, is how wonderful it still is... to be with them.... As yet, i don't know of any Finch people.
Anyways, i have my songs, i have my bands that mean something to me, to suit the moods that i have, and i have fucking moods i tell you. I have my pop mood, i have my emo moods, i have my dance moods, i have my need to inspire moods, i have my angry moods, i have my heartbroken need to be mended moods, i have my wanting to die and need to be saved moods, i have my happy moods, my depression, my obsessions, my feel good songs, my feel like Malaysia songs, my feel like Japan songs, my feel like America songs, my feel like England song, my don't feel like anything at all songs, my nostalgic songs, my beautiful songs...
They are alll theme songs, you know what i mean? i can't seperate the story of my life, the PERIODS of my life without music. Every period that punctuate my life is punctuate, marked, told and live through music and songs that have become the themes and bookmarks that tells the story of my life. I can't extract the experiences of my life from music. every melody, every band, every song, every song that has been loopped a thousand times over, is woven like a pattern into my life. i simply cannot cannot remove them. sure i move from one band to another (except for the constant Ash! hehe), but you know, i cannot look back and tell you or anyone specifically, THAT ONE BAND is my favourite band of all time. That is just simply IMPOSSIBLE. I can tell you the giants of my life: Nirvana, Hole (cause Courtney Love was my role model in those formative teenage age of 12-14), Oasis, Ash, Blink 182, New Found Glory, Finch, Taking Back Sunday, Asian Kung Fu Generation (perhaps)... Those are my giants because they had either changed the course of my life or influenced it tremendously or were the anthems of that period of my life.
I went to a Days Away show once in Baltimore and they played Keep Your Voices Down which at this time was still an unknown song cause it was not on any EPs, it was available only on download which thankfully, i did download. Anyway before Keith played Keep Your Voices Down, he told the story abt a dream he had that inspired Keep Your Voices Down.
In his dream he was hanging out at a neighbors house back in Philadelphia. They were all there just chilling. Then someone came up to him and slit his throat open. And he remember being there bleeding. And he remember feeling the blood in his hands as he was going to the hospital. And while he lay bleeding and dying, he sees a vision of none other than Tim (hehe) and he had this while light shining from behind him. And Tim asks him "So, how does dying feel like?"
And Keith, in his smile, said to Tim:
"It feels like a good song man, it feels like a good song."
So a good song indeed, you need, when you REALLY ACTUALLY feel like dying...
and that's why i love music.
and that's what music means to me.
Sunday, June 26, 2005
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