You know that book, wednesdays at Morries or soemthing like that... Well ok, Wednesday with Ryota.
Lets see
1) he wouldn't take the pencils i gave him. NAZE KA?! sighh... why does he break my heart so?
2) he wouldn't let me take a picture with him cause he said he looks tired. So too bad, all of u can't see how he looks. HOWEVER, i DID deploy Hiro to come see us and he did, and Hiro saidhe was cute... hmmmm neways, more on Hiro later.
3) Good stuff that happened that day.... nothing much... He gave me back the erm, container i used to put the food for him in, and he gave me back some candies, but dats normal ne. But he put it in a nice bag. so that's cute.
4) I told him about how i was depressed, but when other people are happy, i am happy too. Especially like, u know, even things are not working out for me, but if my friend hooks up with a guy she likes, i'd be VERY happy for them!! and it makes me happy too u know... so i told him that and he said (and wrote) "so sweet" ^^... well at least he thinks i'm sweet sometimes toki doki... even if he does think i am crazy too.
5) he gave me a homework that required me find and write the word for beautiful in Japanese. I got the kanji right but i got the sound wrong... So he was trying to make an example with beautiful in it and i said "oh, write that elaine is beautiful" (perasan betul!) and he just looked at me with that cute smile. But he didn't write it.
Then there was another assignment i had to write "her dog is cute but ours is the cutest"... but i didn't know japanese comprative terms... So he taught me... And then he used the example "elaine is beautiful. She is more beautiful. I am the most beautiful" to illustrate the terms for more and most in Japanese. Then he wrote "Elaine is the most beautiful woman in the world" and made me translate that into japanese... OF COZ,i translated WRONGLY. well i didn't do it
wrongly, i got ONE particle wrong. Instead of "sekai de" (in the world), i put "sekai no" (world's/of the world) WELL, AT LEAST he listened to my demand and used
Elaine is beautiful in the end right?!
6) what else cute? nothing else.... After awhile i had nothing left to ask him. Then he asked me "so do you have anymore questions for me? about japanese?" and i said "nope!" and he said, "i'm sad," and i was like "WHY?!" then he said "cause u have nothing to ask me anymore" Then also like, he keeps telling me to say "it is easy!" for something we just learnt and i refused, i
kept saying "muzukashii" (difficult) and he kept saying "say easy!" and i was "no, muzukashii" and then he was like "that's sad!" and i was like "ok ok! it is EASYYYYYYYYY, TOTEMO easy if it makes you happy!!!"
And then, at the end, i was bitching abt all the homework he gave me cause it was ALOTTTTTTTTT... and he kept writing "you can do it elaine," or "show me your effort" and stuff and then i still protested. Then i asked him later "are you happy?" he said, "no"... and i was like "WHY???!! is it because of your results?!" then he said, "no, cause she doesn't want
to do my homework" wuahahahahha...
Then one of the homework he gave me was to summarize what we had learnt that day and then i told him, "you know i actually learn alot from you," then i said cause i have to learn to form sentences in japanese with him (that i don't get much practice in class). Then he said "good, i'm happy. because i want to see you succeed in Japanese,".... he's so nice ne <3 *heart*
7) stuff i like about the whole japanese lesson with ryota is that... I get to translate alot of stuff, or he makes me translate stuff, write papers and essays and you know that's good cause i get put to practice what i know (PARTIALLY) and also, the thing abt Ryota is that, although i don't like to make stupid gramatical mistakes with him, he's very patient with me and he doesn't mind me making mistakes. He just wants to see my effort and i think that's good cause
it's like, i feel it's okay to be wrong but as long as i try.
8) Also, i like how Ryota remembers stuff we had learnt before. Which is nice right? Or like... he
keeps saying "nothing", or "whatever" or "none of your business" or "maybe" (all of which, he taught me how to say in japanese and it's my homework to write a paper based on those phrases). But u know, i like how he remembers details. like how i told him once about
when i was 14 or so, i was abit suicidal and stuff cuase i am depressed and sensitive and i told him that i won't slit my wrist but i was suicidal... and he got shocked with the slit my wrist thing... And then yesterday, i was talking abt depression again and he wrote "slit wrists".... so cute ^^ he remembers u know... and i like stuff like that, cuase it shows that he remembers u know.... and means he's paying attention right?
9) lastly, well... i was showing him pictures of TBS and all that and showed him nate and keith and who i liked and he was like "ouh man! how many guys do you like?!" then i said to him "u know, how it is, i like alot of guys but it's just feeling u know, but there's always one guy who is ichiban in my heart!". Then after seeing the pics he was like "ok, waht's the point to all these?" and i was like "nothing, i just wanted to show you that's all!!!" and i told him how i have no one to talk to usually and he's like the one person i get to spend alot of time with each week... and he laughed and was like "ouh mannn" and he said "go find someone to talk with elaine," and i said "but i want to talk to you!! BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! you don't wanna talk to me cause you're busy all the time," then he mumbled something i couldn't decipher except i
caught the word "romantic" in it and then i was like "what? what did you say?" and he was like "nothing, nothing," and i was like "what! what is it?" then he said "nothing.. forget it." But i did tell him that i am happy when i am with him cause i have fun. Then he gave me EXTRA homework that involves "be happy".
Anyways......... Hiro was really nice to me on Tuesday night. Ryota wrote me an email "Can we study Japanese only wednesday this week maybe the following weeks. I need some more time to take care of myself." and it really made me feel like CRAP u know. I think that totally threw me into an absolute depression. Then i was just lying in bed crying wishing i could go for a
ride... So i went to see Hiro but of course it's so damn late, so he asked me if i am ok but i told him no (i totally have no sort of feeling embrass crying infront of ppl i tell u!!!).... then he told me to hold on abit and he went into his room again... then like 5 mins later he invited me in and we talked and i told him how i am dissapointed with ryota and i was crying and stuff. But he was nice u know, to spend time talking to me abt Ryota.... i guess that's really nice to have a friend staying in the same house huh. Dats why i told him to come see us and say hi the next day and he said he would.... BUTTTTT he didn't! he just walked past and was peering at us but he didn't come say hi. But i saw him and asked him to come over... and so i talked abit to him... I asked him later in the car (while we were going out to see Satoshi) why he didn't come say hi and he said "i didn't want to disturb you and him" and i was like "WHY?!!!!!!" and he was like "the atmosphere was good you know between u and him so i didn't want to disturb!" then i asked him "so what you think abt ryota???" and he said "he's cute!!!" and i was like "REALLY?!" and he was like "YEAH!! really!" and then i was like"DAMNNNNNNNNNNN, that means i won't have a chance then!"
Friday, March 11, 2005
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