Well.... ok... so to this posts now.... erm... That's Hyde on the side dish.... Erm.... why hyde besides that he's damn cute... is also because this post is about Paul... I said like a week or more ago that i was gonna post up some pics of Hyde where Paul looks really REALLY, if not 100% like hyde.... Well this is the pic... Except mabbe the hair was longer.... So yeah... This is how Paul 99.99% looks like.... So now u know why, i dun seem to wanna let go of another losing end??? But anyways i hope this will be a last post i am gonna have about me whining over Paul cause soon.... i am gonna go tell him how i feel.... And how i feel is this....
So ne i am gonna call him and say.... "hello hello.... so hi, how have you been? still busy? anyways are u busy now? cause there's something i wanted to talk to u abt.... You know that time we went out, i know u probably don't remember. but i said like I won't change my personality for anyone... But u know, i've been thinking about relationships lately... and how i felt before with guys i liked... and i realized that, u know that's not really true. I mean. i don't think i can change completely, and i am a demanding girl! hehee... but u know, i realized that if i like a guy... i really just want to make him happy. And even if that means i'd have to compromise. i would. cause i want him to be happy. Like if he don't like something, i won't force him to do it even if i like it. or if he likes something that i don't... i won't mind it... cause i really just want him to be happy... Anyways..... So yeah... waht i wanted to say also is that... I know this might be stupid or frivilous, but u know... Anata ga suki desu (I like you).... I know u might think it's crazy or stupid cause i don't even know you..But u know... there are some things that i do really like about you... Like how you're impulsive, you know, that i REALLY REALLY like... and how i do think that you are a really nice guy at heart, or try to be... and well, i think you are cute... But anyways... my point is that.... I know i may not be your type.... and i know that i'm not hot or fit or cute, bascially, i'm not a to die for material... but you know... I really wish i could make you happy... cause i really want to." |  |
So there... i am gonna tell that to him. Suicidal but i won't kill myself because i have been assigned a news story to write about Suicide which is due on Monday.... So can't really kill myself yo. What do i hope to achive with this? I hope to erm.... I don't know... The thing is that i wanna say that to him and not listen to Desmond's more long term plan advice because i have had enough being hung up over Paul. And i want to unleash the ultimate in hopes of well, getting this whole thing over with....
I would be lying to you if i said i don't hope for something good in return... But the thing is that, the reason why i thought of doing this to begin with is because i had enough of guessing of what's going on.... Basically, i'm just sick and tired of playing the game, i just want to put my bet of everything i have on one last move so that i can get the hell out , check out of this casino and move on down the strip. That's why i am doing this, you know.
So well........... let's see how it goes...........
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