sigh... i realize it's not exactly hopelessness I feel.... It's actually FUTILITY of everything that is my exact true feelings...
it's like what does it matter anyway? Seems like nothing's gonna change....
and what's the good of it anyway? It's not like it's gonna be any different...
so why bother?
As I quote Movielife... "Why do I even try? I don't know, it's all for nothing."
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