SO!!! TODAY I FINALLY WENT FOR MY FIRST OASIS CONCERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sorry ler, but i have to say that, nine years ago, I could contend at being one of the biggest Malaysian Oasis fan, ok!!!!
NEWAYS, although i was NINE YEARS TOO LATE, and the whole BRITPOP era has come and gone and faded away............
I DID FINALLY SEE OASIS LIVE. THERE in that crowd... FINALLY. (btw, i actually REALLY wished Oasis would cover a Stone Roses song, i suddenly felt such an urge and desire to go crazy live with some SR songs!!!)
However, the drawback was that, i did see them at the HOLLYWOOD BOWL (see pic below):
As u can see, it's a huge ass areana. and Unfortunately, it's not knebworth or Maine Rd, where at least those were legendary Oasis shows, so it didn't matter that they looked like ants when u saw them but at least u were part of history. BUT NO, this show was NOT part of history. So, that's the sucky part.
NEWAYS.
OASIS FINALLY CAME ON after supporting acts Kassabian and Jet.
NEW OASIS, that is... so i don't know who the four other dudes were, i only knew Liam and Noel Gallagher..... Noel of course, whom i still love and adore with the same idealism that i did 9 years ago...
super zoom camera.
NEWAYS they came on...
They started with two new songs that, of course, duh, i didn't know. THENNNNNNNNNN the highlight started when they played a very old song Bring It On Down, which i thought was a very odd selection of a song to play. Not just because it was a Definitely Maybe era song but also cause it was a B-side... For a huge arena like this where i would bet 75% of the audience are just casual Oasis listeners, so... WHY THE HECK BRING IT ON DOWN??
Neways, after that they hit into What's The Story Morning Glory, which got the crowd rumbling (mind you, i think there was at least 6,000 people).
But it was here that i did feel though, even when they were playing Bring It On Down, i loved these songs, i really do, and once before, some time ago, i remember i used to obsessed about them and could not stop listening to these songs. I remember how much I rotated Oasis' singles (and i had every one of them for both Definitely Maybe and What's the Story singles) and heard these songs you know.
But i just couldn't help but feel how much, things have changed. That i was indeed.... LATE.
I think the moment really became very very very very incredibly WOW!!! FINALLY for me was when they actually played Cigarettes and Alcohol. Noel said "this song is for the fucking law that say no smoking in places" and I KNEW they were going to play Cigarettes and Alcohol and they did!!!!!!
You know, funny how you suddenly remember the words to the songs even when you've not heard it in awhile. And actually was reminded how poignant the lyrics were "is it worth the aggravation to find yourself a job when there's nothing worth living for?" NO SHIT NOEL!! I guess just gimme some cigarettes and alcohol at this point and i'm sure i'd be set for life! hellz!
But i think the feeling that i was NINE YEARS too fucking late didn't strike me that much till they played Live Forever.
I was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy they played Live Forever. I was thinking abt it before the show that it would be AMAZING!!!!!! SIMPLY nostaglically like a dream coming to live, if they played Live Forever, Acquiesce, Don't Look Back In Anger, Slide Away and all those old old songs. And THEY DID play Live forever!!
Noel said before the song "This song is dedicated to all those in New Orleans" and i had a feeling they'd play Live Forever and they did!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ouh mannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn simply amazing!!!!!
and i was reminded again, of those great lyrics Noel once wrote that really really spoke to my heart and spoke what i felt, "maybe i will never be all the things that i'd like to be, but now is not the time to cry, now's the time to find out why"... Amazinggggg!!
But i think it was here also that halfway being REALLY REALLY like struck wit hthe wonder of FINALLY seeing them live and hearing them play these songs, was when it also crunch on me the very very deep realization that I was VERY VERY much 9 years too late...
I know i was in the middle of it all, but it was in the middle of it all, of a dream becoming true, realizing before my eyes, was when i also realized that i was already too late. This whole thing, this whole phase, this whole essence, and PHENOMENA and entirety of OASIS that i loved, was already gone. This wave that i was in at that moment standing there singing with them Live Forever, and relive/living the moment NOW that i could not live BACK THEN in 96, I realized that that moment was VERY FAKE. It was not the real thing. It was not the real phenomena. THAT phenomenan that was Oasis, that i loved, that I LONGED with my WHOLE HEART to be submerged in it's landslide... that's gone, that's over..... Simply put, the whole Britpop era is done and GONE, and I had the train, the boat and it has sailed... And whatever that i was experiencing at that moment, really is not, really is, just, a shadow, of that... a shadow of what I wanted... I was as if grasping finally the one thing that you had longed for so many years ago, but you realized that what you have in your hands is not the real physical thing but a mere hologram... that's how it felt like.
And I think i felt that the MOST when they played Champagne Supernova, and Liam sang those words "where were you while we were getting high?"
And i remembered those years ago, even back in 97/98 during the tail end of Morning Glory and the near beginging of the Be Here Now era, I remember always singing that line as if Oasis was asking its people "where were you while we were getting high?".... And i remembered writing in some deranged fan mail probably or one of my thousands of Oasis-reflection-lamentation pieces "where were you while we were getting high? I was six thousand miles away, longing to slide away to be caught beneath that landslide of the supernova that is Oasis".
And the sad sad fact that hit me while Liam sang that, and even when I sang back "Someday you will find me, caught beneath the landslide" and knowing that today, that moment was my finally SOMEDAY and i was in that landslide, i was finally part of, one in the sea of thousands in an Oasis crowd, but even when i sang that, I knew that this was just the mere image/reflection/shadow of the actual phenomena that i really wanted to be in those years ago.
Back in 98, I think, I was watching the D'yer Know What I Mean? video of Channel V and going all crazy about it cause it was the first single and it was the first video after Morning Glory and i was all exicted about it. In the midst of the obsessiveness and longing flooding out of my adoring eyes, I remember my brother said to me something along the lines "what are u obsessing about, you're not part of Oasis' people. Cause all their people are THERE in the video, and you're here. So you're not part of it. Give it up."
And you know, in such a shitty but true way, the core of what my brother said, was right. Sybolically Liam singing "all my people right here right now," and there was this bunch of people sitting around watching them with the helicopters and all in that video... It was as if symbolically, it was true... all the Oasis people, the ones who were REALLY THERE, in the HEART of it ALL, in the CORE of the Oasis phenomenan back then, was truly, right there right THEN.
And i was NOT part of it. I never was, I never could, and i will never be. I miss knebworth by 10 days, that first time we visited England. THE historical KNEBWORTH Oasis weekend, yeah, by 10 days.... And I guess no matter how many Hollywood Bowls show i can attend after that, will not make for the fact that I missed it, will not make for the fact that, it will NEVER be that Knebworth Weekend or those Maine Rd show...
that when i was form 3 and i stared out at Stadium Negara pretending it was Maine Rd, wishing that it was and IMAGINING that i was there.... Even if i had seen them, now, I think, it'd still have to go on IMAGINING i was there in the REAL phenomena.
and i guess that's why i didn't feel incredibly beyond belief overwhelmed tonight....
i would STILL give my left lung to have been able to be there in that crowd in Knebworth that weekend or in that two shows in Maine Rd, those years ago..
It was still amazing though, being there, and felt like i was being hit, like my head was exploding, when i did feel though in some tiny moments as if i was caught up FINALLY in the real thing, in the original Oasis supernova landslide i wanted to be in. Especially in moments when they played ACQUIESCE!!!!!!!!!!!
OUH MANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN I really wished and dreamt they would play that song before the show started because i thought "wow man! it would be amazing to hear that song live finally!!!" and i still always remember that one night, that first night when i discovered Acquiesce on the Some Might Say single. I still remember that night. Ouh man i TOTALLY fell in love with that song and looped it the WHOLE NIGHT, and i remember falling in love with Oasis all over again because of that song. I felt that song was so beautiful especially in lights of Liam and Noel's bickering when Noel sang "cause we need each other, we believe in one another, i know we're gonna uncover, what's sleeping in our soul."
And mannnnnnnnnnnnn that song REALLY IS a phenomena to witness live. It's an AMAZING AMAZING live song.
and it was simply BRILLIANT to have had that chance to stand there to listen, to sing, to scream to be MOVED by the power fo the song, that time tonight.
Then they did play wonderwall which liam dedicated and said "this one's for the lads."
But i never realized though, how MELLOW Wonderwall was!! Seriously! It's a beautiful song but i don't think it's a power song like Acquiesce is.
Neways, they ended their set with Rock and Roll Star. When they played the song, I knew i recongized it, and memory again is a funny thing cause i could still remember 60% of the song and pretty much the chorus. which was brillaint. I must say, NOEL GALLAGHER could write fucking BRILLIANT lines back then man, he really did. I guess Manchester did something to him huh!
Neways, the came back for an encore. They played two new songs and when Liam walked off stage (he constantly dissapeared when Noel sang the songs) I KNEW they were going to play Don't Look Back In Anger!!!!!! And it was DEFINITELY confirmed when Noel said it was good to finally play at venues like these instead of fucking clubs, and then he started asking if anyone was mexican. then he said "This one's dedicated to all the people here who are of mexican heritage" (and knowing what america did to the mexicans back thenn... hehe) he started with DON'T LOOK BACK IN ANGER!!!!
It was BRILLIANT to hear all the people, almost 10,000 of them, screaming with him "Slip inside the eye of your mind, don't you know you might find" Brillaint, BRILLIANT!
I tried to record this set but errrr... sorry, my recording sucked, plus u could hear me screaming off key more than u can hear the music too!
And I think it was just amazing, cause Noel didn't sing at all for the entire chorus but instead, the crowd sang it, and it was just brilliant! (if u think abt it, it seems that DLBIA seems to be the more popular one than Wonderwall). BRILLIANT! and of course, the part i screamed the most with my dear Noel was "AND PLEASE DON'T PUT YOUR LIFE IN THE HANDS, OF A ROCK AND ROLL BAND, THROW IT ALL AWAY"
Brilliant... and of course, Don't Look Back In Anger is one of my favourite Oasis tunes... if not, my most favourite one....
and so he sang... "don't look back in anger.... i heard you say..... at least not today...."
brilliant...
then it was their last song, Liam announced, then Noel said "you are the Hollywood Bowl and I am the Hollywood mole, thank you," and they played their last song....
The ending... well, they played a song i didn't know, but it was at the very very very end, the part where the band walks off stage that left me left me overwhelmed
First, I was very surprised by this but i thought that it was actually REALLY REALLY REALLY nice and superbly cool of Liam to do this. But at the end of the last song, some girl managed to climb up on stage, and immeidately i saw this guy run across the stage from the other end and darted towards the girl who was already held back by one security guy but was still clammering her hands towards Liam and Noel. Neways, a few of the security guys managed to haul the screaming girl towards the side of the stage where the speakers were, and i thought it was really really nice and cool of Liam because Liam actually walked quickly over to where the girl was to actually talk to her for abit, or maybe to make sure she was okay, and I thought it was superbly great of him to do that... I guess, to me, it gave me a sense that, you know, it made the show SMALLER, in a way, that it was cool to see or feel as if Oasis is not like those aloft cool-ass bands that don't give a fuck abt fans anymore. That it gave a sense to me as if, not that Oasis is not big, but that they're not a band that is not connected to the fans at all and remains aloof to them, but they're not aloof, you know... they're still there, and no matter how big they've become, maybe they're still Oasis.
And the second thing that left me crying... well, i nearly cried, i didn't want anyone to see, so i didn't cry.... Almost like that time when I wanted to buy, I think it was eithe Q or something else, magazine that had a SPECIAL OASIS issue... And i remember going to the store at 1 Utama and walking into the music store and not find it there. When i enquired, they store clerk told me that it was SOLD OUT. I remember walking out of the store at the verge of tears after he told me that, and i remember that when i walked out of the complex at the underground parking, i just started crying like hell, because i thought i had missed.... lost, failed, to hold, to grasps a part of them that i was so, very desperate to attain... to hold, to own. I wanted every piece of them that i could get, I had already missed and lost so much, and i didn't want to lose any more...
And it was like that moment again, it was as if i was turned into that 16 year old again you know.
And it was when Noel Gallagher finally bade his goodbye and walked off stage.
He was meddling around with his guitar abit, then he put it down and said thank you, then he walked to the front of the stage to get something that someone was holding out to him. He autographed it, shook more hands, then took a bow, blew a kiss, then waved goodbye, turned around and walked off... like the many many times i had watched him do, and now for real.
when he waved goodbye, and i knew this was it... i really felt as if i was 14 again, you know... and when he waved, i actually waved back but caught myself, because, it was really saying goodbye you know...
and i was 14 again... and all those years that i had longed for them... and now, he was going to be gone....
I guess, the show was not as if a dream come true, or at least i didn't feel completely overwhelmed as if "wow!!!!! I'm in this finally!!!!" in that sense of connection to the feelings that i felt for Oasis, and the longings and wantings and mad obsessive cravings i had all those years ago back home when i used to look out of my Form 3 classroom towards Stadium Negara and pretended it was Maine Rd and said good morning to Noel Gallagher every day. While i was watching the show and finally singing those songs, I didn't feel as if I was in that whole Oasis mania '96 phenomenan... i was happy and i was glad... but i knew, i knew, i knew, i had ALREADY missed IT ALL, you know.
But at the ENDING of the show, when noel was going to walk off stage and when he did walk off stage, i was totally sucked back into that whole thing. And i think if there was one moment in the show that i REALLY REALLY REALLY felt as if I WAS 14 back in 1996 ACTUALLY am part of and experiecing the whole Oasis 96 mania phenomenan first hand for REAL, it was that final moment when Noel Gallagher was walking off stage....
if was as if, when he walked out... a part of me, a very very old part of me that i can still feel so nostalgically, died along with it...
and then the stage was silent, and the crowd began to disperse..
and then the crisps clear sound of the piano of Let It Be began to play and echo in the wake...
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
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